yourbestguysgun | -- oh dear diary, we fell apart.

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-- where: poly-chromatic

-- oh dear diary, we fell apart.

"... What do you mean record a message? Ain't the whole point it bein' the other way round. Stupid piece o' --."

☎ Call
☏ Text
✔ Voicemail

[ ooc: action is also a-okay, if you know where to find him. :) ]

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There's gotta be something, I just haven't thought of it yet.

Bucky, trust me.

[Please.]

You can't -- [ Still not looking at him. ] You can't just think I'm gonna sit back and let you, Steve. How many times have I waded in for you and you think I'd let you die alone?

Of course I don't. I would never think that.

Then m'gonna do somethin' about it.

[Steve takes a deep breath, and he nods, finally. The pit in his stomach gets heavier, because he doesn't want to lie, but even less than that, he doesn't want Bucky to know]

Okay. Okay.

[ Bucky breathes in, holds the breath for a moment, because he's gone and worked himself up. He should apologise, but there's only ever been one thing that could push him to the brink and that's the thought of losing Steve, of not having him in his life anymore.

Letting it out in a shakey exhale. ] Shit.

[Steve moves in just a little closer]

That wasn't fair. What I just put you through.

You should'a told me sooner, Steve. [ Because he'd rather know, and think of a way to keep the knowledge in his head when he leaves. ]

Fuck. [ Shoulders slumping. } Sorry, sorry. I shouldn't a - I just. [ He can't lose him. ]

I know.

[He offers a hand, but doesn't expect it to get taken]

[ Staring down at his hand. Bucky doesn't know what to do, which is the worst part, he doesn't know how to react, because keeping his feelings in check was never his strong point, but talking about it's just as bad. ]

Come on. I'm right here now.

[ It's the right thing to say, because he twists until he can wrap his arms around Steve's back, press into him and tell himself that he's all right. ]

Sorry, sorry. God, I'm such a jerk.

[Steve closes his eyes and hold on.]

Yeah, you are, but that's all right.

[He presses his mouth just against Bucky's neck - not a kiss, just a press]

I love you, okay? More than anything else in this place and I should have said it before, I should have never let you doubt that.

[ Sounding briefly perplexed for a moment, like he's finding it hard to keep up with everything. ] I never said I doubted it.

Just stay right here, okay?

M'not goin' anywhere, I won't.

I'm sorry I've been so distant.

[He really, really is]

[ Bucky just shakes his head, presses his forehead against Steve's neck for a moment simply to soak up his touch. ]

Jus' don't do it again, huh?

[Steve's hand moves to Bucky's side nad he nods]

Yeah, I got it.

This place is really doin' fuck all for emotional welfare, huh? [ And then with a spike of guilt. ] I shouldn't'a flipped, y'were feelin' bad enough.

[Steve shakes his head once]

Guess it's better all this come out on the same day.

Yeah.

[ Sighing. ] Shame you can't get drunk, feels like we need it.

That's for damn sure.

Maybe I'll go punch Howard for it.

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